Nomura's acquisition of Lehman's internal operations has not gone as smoothly as everyone had hoped. The Lehman employees are being very difficult, all but refusing to submit to their new employer's way of doing things. Particularly the women. Despite being told that short sleeves are not acceptable, as they are the clothes of whores, these Lehman ladies apparently spent the summer just absolutely slutting it up. I'm talking sleeveless tops. I'm talking silk shirts. I'm talking bright nail ! polish. Well no more! The summer's over, and you've had your kicks. It's time to lock it up and know what else? This goes for any of the men straddling the line between "upstanding businessman" and gigolo. And don't give me this shit that you couldn't understand the memo. One short sleeve, one red nail-- and I mean one-- and you're gone.
Exactly a year after Nomura made its successful lunge for Lehman Brothers, the official line in Tokyo is that the merger is running like clockwork.
One or two oddments, though, are still getting lost in translation — despite the ready availability of native English speakers around to take a glance over any important company circulars.
A recent e-mail politely reminded staff in Nomura’s Tokyo headquarters that “gay colour nail polish and manucure” fell outside the company’s strict dress code.
The trading floor was also left baffled by guidelines on the correct type of trousers: “Wear the one gives to the ankle to the height of pants”.
September 30 marked the end of Nomura’s “Cool Biz” summer ecological campaign for its Tokyo headquarters — an annual scheme that amounts to turning the thermostat up slightly and allowing people to take their jackets and ties off.
With autumn now arrived those carefree, tie-less months are gone and the winter dress code is in force. “Bare foots”, said the memo, are no longer appropriate.
Unsuitable clothes are listed by category. Under the “jacket and suit” heading, for example, bankers are reminded to avoid “the one of lustrous material”. Skirts may neither be extremely short nor be a “skirt that deep slit entered”.
A Nomura spokesperson said that the unfortunate translation was a well-intentioned attempt by one Japanese manager to make sure that people knew the summer dress code had ended.
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